26 – It’s Over (6)

 

Jake stared at his unanswered texts to Axel. He could tell he read them. But why wasn’t he responding? Was he mad at him? Why would he be mad at him?

Maybe he should try tracking Axel down in person. Then he’d have to talk to him.

The day after leaving the hospital, Jake drove over to the mechanic shop. Not because he expected Axel to be working, but because that was where he kept his van parked. And if Axel wasn’t staying with Jake, he had to be hiding out in his van.

But there was no sign of Axel inside it. Jake peeked through the windows and knocked on the door. Nothing.

Was he working?

Jake walked up to the building, towards the open garage area. There, he found Axel, peering under the hood of a car. A few feet away, his coworker worked on a different car.

Jake strode up to Axel. “Hey, stranger.”

Axel jumped, nearly hitting his head on the open hood. “Jake! What are you doing here?”

“I could ask you the same question. Shouldn’t you be resting?”

“I can’t afford to take time off.” Axel returned to inspecting the car.

“Why haven’t you responded to my texts?”

“Seriously?” Axel hissed, sparing a glance at his coworker, who had abandoned his work to eavesdrop.

“Yes, seriously. I’ve been worried-”

Axel grabbed Jake’s shoulder, and steered him away from the garage, limping to the back of the building. He moved his head around the vacant surroundings, before addressing Jake. “You’re seriously pulling this shit after what happened the other night?”

“What shit? Checking in on you?”

“My coworker was standing right there!”

“Are you telling me it’s gay to make sure your friend is okay?”

“Ian has had a lot of questions about my injuries I’ve given vague answers to. Now, you show up just as bruised, with a cast on your nose-”

“Yeah, one of those assholes broke it.”

“Now he’ll be even more curious! Especially when you make a big deal out of me not texting you back. You sound like an angry girlfriend. All he needs to do is search my name, and put two and two together. If he hasn’t done so already.”

“He has no proof.”

“Jake…” Axel pinched the bridge of his nose. “Have you learned nothing from this?”

Learned? He was supposed to have learned something? Jake tilted his head to the side.

“I have told you,” Axel said slowly, “time and time again. Be careful of what you say or do. Make sure nobody is around before saying or doing anything that could be interpreted as romantic- or sexual. Save it for the privacy of your bedroom, or my van. Because if the wrong person catches us, there will be consequences.”

Jake scoffed. “So, what, we’re supposed to live our lives in fear?”

“Yes! That’s exactly what we’re supposed to do!”

How depressing. “You know, I was gonna ask if you wanted to help me press charges against those assholes-”

“Don’t you dare!” Axel shouted. Jake flinched, and Axel lowered his voice, checking their surroundings before continuing. “You bring this to a judge, you know what’s gonna happen? Those boys are gonna tell them what they saw us do. They’re going to look into our backgrounds. See what I’m blacklisted for. See that protest you did for gay rights. Who do you think they’ll believe? And it’ll be true-”

“But they don’t have proof-”

“It’s enough to convince a jury. They’ll side with the boys, say we deserved it. Even if we do win, this incident will show up on my records, and I’ll have a hard time getting my blacklisting case appealed next year- if at all. And you’ll be lucky if they don’t decide to blacklist you too while they’re at it. So no. You keep what happened to yourself.”

“Seriously?” So they couldn’t even try to get justice for what happened?

“Yes. Seriously. In less than a year, I’ll finally have a chance to get blacklisting off my record. If you care about me, you’ll keep this to yourself.”

“Fine.” Jake breathed in through his clenched teeth. “Fine. But can you at least tell me why you’ve been ignoring me?

Axel averted his gaze while Jake stood, waiting for an answer.

“Well?” Jake asked. “Did I do something to upset you?”

“I mean, you’re the reason I have a big hospital bill headed my way.”

“I’m the reason?” Jake didn’t ask those men to assault them. “How am I-”

“You gave them a reason! Because you couldn’t…” Axel looked around. Still nobody in sight. “You couldn’t wait until we were in a safe place. I’ve told you a hundred times, but you never remember. One thing I ask of you. One thing! Don’t pull that shit in public. But no. Now, I’m the one suffering for it.”

Jake’s body ached. His swollen nose was hard to breath through. People stared at the bruises on his face. “I’m suffering too.”

“Oh, you’re suffering?” Axel raised his head, and waved in the direction of the parking lot. “My van – my fucking home – got towed away because I was stuck overnight in the hospital.”

“What?!”

“I couldn’t even pick it up until the day after I got out. I almost spent the night on the street!”

“You should have told me! I would have let-”

“Thankfully, Sebastian helped me. And by the way, he told me just how much you suffered. How was your hospital stay? Was the food good? Were the nurses attentive? Did somebody have to give you a god damn blood test before they’d even touch you?!”

“What?” While Jake did enjoy the food and could’ve done with less attention, the last question confused him. “They wouldn’t touch you without testing your blood first?”

“Yeah.” Axel lowered his voice. “Because someone there ran a little background check on me.”

Why would blacklisting warrant a blood test? “I don’t get it.”

“People here,” Axel spoke in a patronizing tone that grated Jake’s ears, “worry people like us are carrying a certain, deadly disease. One they can get from touching our blood. Nobody wanted to go near me-”

“That’s homophobic!”

“Yeah, no shit.”

“You could’ve died while they waited for a result.” And wouldn’t drawing more blood to someone who already lost a lot of blood put their life at even more risk?

“Welcome to Jefferson.”

“So you’re jealous because I had a better experience at the hospital?”

Axel slapped his forehead. “No! I’m glad you were taken care of. I’m mad that I had a worse experience for your mistake. Not to mention what this bill is gonna cost me. I already had to pay 14,000 ameros just to get my van back!”

“I can give you the money.”

“That’s not the point.” Axel raked his fingers through his hair. “Listen. I like you. You’re a good person. I appreciate all you’ve done for me. But I don’t know if I can keep doing this.”

Jake’s stomach sank. Surely Axel wasn’t about to dump him over this? “You’re breaking up?”

Axel let out a shaky breath, and did another look around the empty area. “I’m not in love with you. And honestly? At this point, I don’t think I ever will be.”

“That’s fine. I once dated an aromantic.”

“A what?” Axel shook his head. “No. Forget that. Listen. I need to be with someone I can fall in love with. This relationship has been fun, but the attraction has only ever been physical. Not romantic.”

“So?” Jake’s relationship with the aromantic had been similar. They only broke up because she moved away. “Nothing wrong with no romance in a sexual relationship.”

Axel’s eyes widened at that, and Jake knew he was about to hear a rant filled with amatonormativity and arophobia. About how pure and precious romantic love was, and a relationship built on sex alone was shameful. Typical religious horseshit laced with puritanical undertones.

Maybe this breakup would be for the best. Jake leaned against the wall, grinding his teeth. “You know what? You’re right. We should break up. I need someone more open-minded like me.”

“Open-minded? You?” Axel let out a bark of laughter. “You think you’re so open-minded, when really, you’re just as close-minded as the rest of this town!”

Jake opened his mouth to protest. He was the only open-minded person in Gilran, after all. But Axel shouldered past him, headed straight towards the garage. Their relationship was officially over.

Kicking at the building, Jake walked away with a weight in his stomach. Sure, he wasn’t in love with Axel either, but he still enjoyed spending time with him. Not only that, but he was Jake’s only friend. Well, other than Maple. But Maple was under house arrest.

Jake got into his car, thoughts on Maple. Hopefully, things would change once she moved in with Neil. There was a chance their friendship could pick up right where it left off, albeit in secret. Maple was so much cooler than Axel anyway.

And he no longer had to listen to Axel’s lectures. Sometimes it was like he was dating his father. No more of his “that’s life in Jefferson- get used to it” attitude. Christ, he could be real annoying. The heaviness lifted. Maybe this breakup was for the best.

Yes, it was the end, for now. But with an end, comes a new beginning.